Have you ever heard “You were given two ears and one mouth for a reason”? This wasn’t invented by parents so kids would be quiet. It is actually based on a statement by the Greek philosopher Zeno three hundred years before Jesus. So, it appears running our mouths is not a recent invention, even though doing it on social media is. Simply put, we should listen more than we speak.
You might be thinking “I don’t know how to shut up to listen!” Don’t be discouraged if you are, as I’ve been in your shoes. Reading this right now is an act of listening. When we listen, we seek wisdom. We grow when we seek wisdom. Solomon tells us early in Proverbs “Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance.” (Proverbs 1:5 ESV)
Listening is crucial to creating relationships and sustaining them. When we listen, we intentionally give attention to someone or something. Our focus is being devoted to something other than making sure we are heard. Listening is a willingness to begin learning.
Give attention to others, got it. But wait. Does this mean I have to listen to everyone about everything?
There are not enough waking hours in life to give that much attention. Who and what we listen to matters. Who then should we listen to? Let’s go again to Proverbs. “My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God.” (Proverbs 2:1–5)
First and foremost, we must listen to God and seek His truth; that is the standard by which we determine who, what, and how to listen. Knowing God’s truth is like knowing 2+2 always equals 4. When we are faced with a different answer, we can know what isn’t right and begin to teach the truth. Listening devotes our attention to Him, and then to people He brings into our life. We must listen and let Jesus lead us so we can lead others in the way He showed us.
Something else, listen to people who have a different experience in life than you. Hear how they navigated good times and bad. Understand their ”why” to know how they came to their point of view, whether it is the same or different from yours. Beware of complainers - those that insist nothing is ever right, someone is to blame, and don't offer reasonable solutions. You can be a positive influence on them, but you could get pulled into their discontentment if you are not careful.
Be intentional in your listening to learn and potentially help someone. We are being served by a gracious and merciful Savior who wants us to listen. Therefore give time, grace, and mercy to the words of others.
What do I do with this?
Talk with someone you may not know or know well. You’ll be surprised at the things you have in common and start to understand who they are. Conversation is becoming a lost practice in our digital messaging age and we need to practice it more.
Also, if you have a smartphone and some headphones/earbuds, begin to listen to scripture in a Bible app, find podcasts that will grow your mind, and consider discovering audiobooks from trusted teachers.
Explore Scripture
Proverbs 12:15
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.
John 18:37
Then Pilate said to him, “So you are a king?” Jesus answered, “You say that I am a king. For this purpose I was born and for this purpose I have come into the world—to bear witness to the truth. Everyone who is of the truth listens to my voice.”
James 1:19
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;